The Academy v Lyceum Marathon 330 BC
In Athens of old,
As I’ve heard it told,
There were two schools of philosophy;
They were rivals in thought
And they could have fought,
But did something else, as you’ll see.
Xenocrates, head
Of t’Academy, said,
‘Our ex-pupil’s set up a Lyceum.
His name’s Aristotle,
He doesn’t lack bottle
If he thinks he can outsmart our team.
‘If Plato were here
We’d have nothing to fear;
He’d wrestle that man to the ground.
But now that he’s dead
It’s our job instead,
And our way to honour is found.
‘So who’s for a run?
Come, there must be someone,
Who can hurdle or wrestle or race?’
A silence ensued
As blushes imbued
Each chubby Academy face.
‘But sir, we’re not real!’
Was t’pupils’ appeal,
‘Our Form is not universal.
A real athlete
Escapes a defeat
By regular active rehearsal.’
‘It’s true,’ said the boss,
‘We’ll be at a loss
With our sedent’ry habits of talk
While at the Lyceum—
You really should see ‘em—
They all think and talk as they walk.’
Xenocrates then
Began chewing his pen
And the pupils each furrowed his brow.
Until one of them said
‘We could try this instead;
I’ll explain what I thought of just now:
‘I heard of a fable—
Recall, if you’re able—
That came down from Aesop the slave.
It concerned a reptile,
Achilles, with a smile,
Said he’d race if the tortoise were brave.
‘You’d think Achilles won,
But he stopped to have fun,
And the tortoise toiled steadily on.
The moral’s about
How persistence wins out
And that tortoise proved it no con.
‘Let’s run a replay
Of that fateful day
When t’Greeks beat t’Persians at Marathon;
Like the soldier who ran
With the news, so we can
Have a race from there up to t’Parthenon.’
So t’challenge was sent
To t’Lyceum and went
To its chief, the great Aristotle.
He was known to be wise,
And they told us no lies
When they’d said he had plenty of bottle.
‘See here lads’, he said.
As he nodded his head,
‘T’Academy mob’s asked us to race.
So let’s give ‘em one,
And we’ll have the most fun,
They’re unfit and we have more pace.’
A date was agreed
And they travelled with speed
To the Marathon spot they had set.
‘We’ll give you a start,
As we do have some heart.’
Said t’Lyceum team when they met.
‘Oh, we think we’ll win,’
Said Xenoc with a grin.
‘Your favours are surely misplaced.
But we’ll take the let
And make you a bet
That you’ll find yourselves badly outpaced.’
T’ Academicians began,
And they puffed as they ran,
And could hear t’Lyceum men coming after.
Those didn’t puff,
And if that weren’t enough,
They were sure they could also hear laughter.
But t’Lyceum team
Said ‘Our run’s a dream
For motion is just a chimera;
Despite all our pain
We won’t make a gain
And so we can never get nearer.
‘When they have begun,
The distance they run,
We need to run after, that’s clear.
By then they’ve run more
And they still go before
While we remain back in the rear.’
‘Ah, that’s from old Zeno
I know that it seems so
Unlikely, as we know we travel’.
Aristotle slowed down
As he said with a frown,
‘It’s a problem for us to unravel.’
They slowed to a walk
To continue their talk,
While t’Academy team stumbled on;
Those were now distant specks
And when they looked next,
By Achilles and Zeus, they were gone.
Aristotle said, ‘Team,
You know it would seem
That our rivals will reach Athens first;
But fear not nor fret
For while we lose t’bet
We gain that for which all of us thirst.
‘Our goal is the kind
That enriches the mind:
To live life as well as we’re able,
And there’s more to this race
Than a fast running pace
As Aesop revealed in his fable.
‘The tortoise has won,
But did he have fun
As he plodded the length of the track?
While we will have time
Those green hills to climb,
And enjoy t’view ‘ere we go back’.
So the moral, you ask?
Is, for ev’ry task,
Look for t’value in just taking part;
We don’t have to win
(Though to do so’s no sin),
Find fulfilment right from the start.